All In Again
by urbanmonkey
Summary: Lorelai misses Luke. She's lonely, and it takes the words of her only daughter to do what she does not want to do. Java Junkie reconciliation fic set at the end of the season. It's a work in progress.
1. Chapter 1

All In Again

Luke and Lorelai/Java Junkie

**Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls. If I did, Luke and Lorelai would be married already and Chris wouldn't ever exist. All the characters belong to Amy Sherman Palladino and are being brought back by the great Dave Rosenthal! GO DAVE!!!**

* * *

"_Finally,"_ I thought to myself as I walked through the door to my home and shuffled down the hall.

I dropped my keys on the table next to the answering machine as my fingers automatically pressed the button.

"You have no messages," the robotic voice of the machine sounded, echoing ten times louder in the silence of my empty home.

I sighed and shrugged off my jacket, placing it across the back of the chair and wandering into the kitchen. I reached up in the cupboard for my coffee. I looked in the bag as I pulled it out and was dismayed to see it was nearly gone. There was barely enough there for a very weak cup. I dropped the bag on the counter and sighed. It had been a long and difficult day and all I wanted was a good cup of coffee and to go to bed.

I had signed the divorce papers and sent them back to Chris's lawyer. Even though we both knew that the marriage wasn't right for either of us, I still felt a tinge of regret that the marriage hadn't worked out. I was now 38, newly divorced and all alone.

I curled up on the couch and tucked my legs underneath me as I attempted to watch TV. However, I found that I could not pay attention to the movie that was playing, even if it was a classic like Casablanca and one of my favorite movies. My mind kept wandering back to the happy times from the last two years. A movie night. A waltz. A first kiss. A Horoscope. An ice rink. An engagement. An "I love you." I knew I still loved Luke. I had never stopped.

The phone rang , bringing me back to reality.

"Hey Mom," Rory's voice came over the line.

"Hello my darling daughter! You made it back to Yale in one piece?"

"Well aside from the arm and a leg it cost me to fill up my car with gas, yes. Although I did leave my heart there with you."

"Aw, now that's something I won't ever be giving back, no matter how many Malomar cookies you bribe me with," I replied with a smile.

"So how are you?" he asked, concern in her voice.

"Fine," I said with a shrug of my shoulders. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well you just signed the divorce papers."

"I'm fine Rory," I insisted. "I mean, yeah, it's weird you know? I mean, I'm married one minute and divorced six weeks later. I feel as though I've just pulled a Britney except she got her first one annulled."

"Well, at least you haven't shaved your head," Rory replied. "So what are you doing?"

"Thinking," I said simply.

"About Luke?" she asked, interpreting the tone in my voice.

"_She's too smart for her own good,"_ I thought to myself.

"I miss him kid," I admitted quietly aloud. "I miss him a lot."

"Go talk to him Mom," she urged.

"Rory, I can't. What I did to him was..." I paused, shuddering as the expression on Luke's face when I told him I'd slept with Chris flashed through my mind. "Awful," I finished lamely. "He'll never forgive me for that."

"You forget though, that Logan did the same thing last year. I forgave him and look where we are now."

"You however, are not a monosyllabic man wearing flannel and backwards baseball caps."

"Mom, come on. You still love him. I know you do," she paused waiting for me to respond. When I didn't she continued, "Just go talk to him Mom. Go in and get a cup of coffee and tell him how you feel."

"Rory," I began.

"Just think about it," she interrupted. "Oh I've gotta go. Logan's calling in. I love you Mom. Bye!"

"But..." I tried to say as the line went dead.

_I can't do it_ I thought, again turning my attention back to Casablanca.

However as the minutes dragged on, I couldn't get Rory's words out of my mind. These, combined with the memory of our first of many movie nights was becoming too much for me to handle. I glanced up at the clock and knew that Luke would be closing the diner shortly. I stood up and grabbed my jacket, slipping it on as I walked out the door.


	2. Chapter 2

All In Again

Luke and Lorelai/Java Junkie

**Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls. If I did, Luke and Lorelai would be married already and Chris wouldn't ever exist. All the characters belong to Amy Sherman Palladino and are being brought back by the great Dave Rosenthal! GO DAVE!!!**

* * *

My feet carried me towards the diner, a path I'd followed close to a million times over the last ten years. As I walked, Luke's words from our first date echoed in my mind:

"_This thing we're doing here, me, you, I just want you to know I'm in. I am all in."_

I knew I was ready this time to be all in with Luke. I only hoped he still felt the same way.

I reached the diner a few minutes later with butterflies going crazy in my stomach. I stopped and looked in the window. The diner was empty and Luke was there, just as I expected him to be. I watched him as he finished wiping down the counters and went to balance his daily receipts.

I placed my hand on the door knob and took a deep breath to calm my racing heart and slowly opened the door, the bell jingling merrily as I stepped inside.

"We're closed," Luke said gruffly, not even looking up from his receipts.

I opened my mouth to reply, but nothing came out. Luke finally looked up and his blue eyes locked with mine. I felt my breath catch in my throat as our eyes made contact.

"Lorelai,"he breathed.

"Hi Luke," I said quietly.

"Coffee?" he asked, reaching for the pot behind him.

"Always," I replied, smiling slightly.

"Coming right up," he said, pulling out my cup from underneath the counter and pouring a full cup of the liquid I loved so much.

I sat down at the counter a few stools down from the register, picked up the mug took a long swallow.

"I missed that," I said aloud.

Luke was back balancing receipts, looked up at me briefly before continuing to add columns of numbers.

I ran my finger along the edge of the cup and stared into the contents for a moment before I finally spoke.

"Luke?"

"Hmm?" he replied, not looking up.

I took a deep breath. "I love you."

I saw him visibly stiffen and he looked directly at me, pain evident in his eyes.

"Lorelai," he warned.

"No Luke, let me talk. I love you. I know what I did to you was horrible and that you will never forgive me for sleeping with Christopher." I saw a muscle in his jaw twitch in anger at the mention of Chris. "But you have to know Luke that it was all a mistake. The relationship, the marriage, going to him that night. I tried to love him, but I couldn't. Because all I ever thought about was you. I miss you Luke. I miss your kiss. I miss your arms wrapped around me, I miss your rants about my caffeine and junk food addictions. And I just wanted to tell you that I'm so sorry for everything. I should have spoken up and not issued that ultimatum. I understand if you never want to talk to me again, or if you can't forgive me. But I wanted to tell you that I love you, I'm all in for real this time, and I am so, so sorry."

Luke continued to starer at me, but didn't say anything. The expression on his face was unreadable.

I slid off the stool and slipped a few dollars underneath the cup and walked towards the door. I placed my hand on the doorknob, and opened the door, the bells clinking in the silence. I paused before I walked out and turned back around to face Luke and noticed he was still staring intently at me. His blue eyes pierced mine, sending a wave of chills down my spine and butterflies swarming again in my stomach.

"I'll wait Luke," I said quietly, my eyes never leaving his. "I'll wait as long as you need, if that's what you decide to do."

Then I stepped outside and quietly shut the door behind me and began my lonely walk home.


End file.
